Sometimes you just know when you are with family.
When you sit quietly, and want to listen. When all of you share your wants and desires. And their goals are the same as yours.
When they pray with you and allow their hearts to pour out for all to see, and their hearts are pure. And neither age nor employment affect the direction of your lives.
Tonight I give thanks in praise and relief for newfound family.
I have so much to say, yet no words come out. Of course, it is the first time in weeks that I am trying to get them out.
Have you ever felt something so deeply that you wanted to share?
Have you ever felt it and then been unable to put it into words?
I’m sure most of us have, but the putting it into words thing just isn’t something most of us dwell on.
My mother hovers on the brink of death. She is so far away physically, but she feels so close emotionally – in my heart. So close that I can almost feel my arms around her.
I am so torn. I want so much to go visit her, and it is possible. As costly and time consuming as it might be, I know that once I am there I won’t regret it. Because life is for the living, and if I can give her any comfort then it would be worth it. Better than spending money on a funeral.
Oh, but the timing. But when is it ever good? Worrying about the kid’s schooling, and their missed work… Is that a real reason or an excuse?
I did say goodbye to her in August when we were there. And it was a good serious goodbye.
But maybe she is waiting to see me one more time before she lets go? How do I know if I would agitate her or comfort her?
And family… Some of them so noble and giving, loving and comforting.
I pray that she is peaceful and comforted. I pray that she is without pain, and at rest.
Would you pray, too?
Sometimes life is so stressful. When that happens, I have a trick. You might call it avoidance. Or denial. Whatever you call it, I am really good at it. Sometimes I eat, sometimes I play the piano (this works similar to a treadmill, but not), and sometimes I work in the garden. I would always rather garden than clean house… or pay bills… or lots of stuff…
I am sweaty and hot. I have been working in the yard for a few hours, just putzing around, hoping to get a handle on the shape of the landscape.
Which, might I add, is pretty much a wreck.
But the last thing I was just trying to accomplish was the clearing out of some brush that had grown out of nowhere behind our shed. The brush was a mixture of some giant unnamed green weeds and what I was taught to call “bird bushes”. These are the bushes with the little red balls of fruit on them that are poisonous for people but not for birds.
All the while I was cutting, I kept hearing a bird scolding me. I had no clue why…
But within this mess of bushes, as I clipped and cut away, I found a nest.
I quickly tried to rectify my transgression, literally picking up the sticks and weeds I had just cut down, placing them gently and protectively over the nest.
Within days we saw those three blue eggs hatch. With their mouths agape and necks stretching, we saw baby birds clamoring for food, and heard mommy and daddy bird scolding us each time we got too close.
Two weeks later, the babies have flown away. Still there, sits that nest, empty.
I think about all of the things that nest held for those baby birds: safety, security, food, and family.
And I know how blessed I really am.
Sharing here, won’t you join me?
I need a weekend for my weekend !
Grocery shopping, driving kids here & there (off to work, to the movies), and lots of loads of laundry!
Church on Sunday, packing a picnic lunch, hiking (no donuts).
Napping (that was only me) and lawn mowing.
The kids making Mozzarella and Tomato salad and a variation of a pepperelly dip, and enjoying fish tacos for dinner – fresh fish baked with olive oil and creole seasonings. Laughing and being silly, and the drudgery of cleaning the craft room.
I didn’t even get the things done that I had on my list!
On our hike, we came across a number of bugs, a frog, and lots of budding foliage, but the kids loved these cute little red salamanders the best…
I hope you have a restful Monday!